Showing posts with label travelling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label travelling. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Towards Brighter Things Via Brussels


There is something splendid about travelling early in the morning. Something that makes you feel like you're a god. Alright, a minor one. 
At so many moments in life mankind feels overwhelmed and lonely, and cut off. Early mornings however, seem to have quite the opposite effect. At least on me.
There is joy and hope. There is being-overwhelmed, too - but for different reasons. It feels a little like all was here simply for me to see, for my profound pleasure, for my wonder and awe.
Is that why they call it a miracle? The miracle of another dawn, another day - the grace of a fresh start?
And indeed it is, isn't it?
There it comes, that new day, utterly unspoilt.
(Am I beginning to sound like some born-again something or other? FYI: No, I have not joined a cult.)
Still, there is magic in the moment when the first sunlight hits the earth.
A silent, gradual march on darkness and without fail light always prevails. Which is reassuring and can, if you are that way inclined, give you that proverbial ounce of hope.

I am indeed travelling. With Deutsche Bahn. At this precise moment this fact does not lessen the pleasure of my witnessing the sun coming up. At the butt crack of dawn (as Kathy Griffin phrased it so aptly) I rolled out of bed and onto the train - not in one continuous motion, mind, but the smoothness of it all was spectacular. I am sure it had to do with the fact that I am going on a sort of mini-break to Brussels and that it is so damned early that everyone else is turning around in their beds one more time.
Still I cannot quite help but wonder where the Dickens this dawn/hope babble is coming from?
Granted, I love travelling early in the morning. Granted too, that I love going to Brussels. And granted finally that the sun rise is a beautiful thing and usually does get anyone who gets up early enough into a bit of a state of bliss. That is if you genuinely care for such things as birds beginning to stir, the mist rising slowly off the earth, the heavens turning from grey to a soft pink etc.
I admit I am in holiday-mode, thus, in high spirits. This week away is sorely needed after what seems an eternity of gloom and depression.
So, I may be forgiven if I feel like "a change is gonna come". But then that tends to freak people out, including me. Of late I have become more than a bit apprehensive of change.
But today - with this glorious day just beginning - I am willing to lift my head a little bit higher than usual and actually take a peak at what life may have in store. I am in dire need of practice, I'll admit readily. You get like that after a shit storm has rained down on you and caused a substantial change in your view on life and yourself. That is just a fact and I wish to God I was one of those people who after they have fallen get up again and carry on regardless. Nope, not me. Once I am down it takes me a while. Hell, it took a lot of work to get me so low. Might as well make the most of it.
Wallowing? Who me? Occasionally one resorts to that kind of behaviour, I admit. However, this time it was just difficult to simply pretend nothing had happened. Also I had misplaced that brush I usually dust myself off with after major and minor mishaps.

Is it possible that this week in Brussels will set me off to a good start? Like it has done in the past? Yes, Brussels does that to me sometimes. Thus happened in 2004 before my first big final exams at uni.
So if I have any say in this change that seems to be a-coming then I’d like this week to be the Auftakt, the prelude.
(I like how I am not convinced that I could have a choice in this and that I seem to believe that change is an event that is coming at us from the outside exclusively. At this point I wish very much to set myself straight once and for all: here, change is a) not an event and b) happens within you, too. It’s a bloody process, it’s gradual, get it?!?! Alright, I do not hesitate to add: Well at least usually.)

I blame it on the early hour and my destination but I cannot deny that I feel a rising conviction, ok now that is a tad too strong. No, I feel hope and I have faith that at least some of the dark will go, will be chased away and there will be more clarity, more assurance and confidence. I actually went to sleep last night with that exact thought of hope in my head. I take that as a sign.
Perhaps it works this thinking positive things and surrounding myself with positivity. Let us see, shall we. 

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